How to Stay True to Yourself in a World Built on Comparison


In today’s world, comparison has become as regular as breathing. Comparing how we look, how we live, how successful we are, what we have… It’s just the American (and human) way. As we scroll, swipe, read, and chat, we are faced with individuals who seem bigger, better, and overall more confident than us. What’s their secret, you wonder? How do they get to the top while you hover and struggle a few steps below?

Focus is everything.

When you spend energy or your precious, limited time trying to crack someone else’s “success code,” you’re neglecting your own. Remember: There’s enough success to go around. And around. And around. And you’ll never get to your own pinnacle of success by obsessing over someone else’s. Your key to success is to take all of that focus and turn it on YOU.

If you’re knee-deep in a business venture, it can be hard to stay true to your values, morals, and goals. Sometimes what used to work, doesn’t. What once rang true fades. The first step to staying true to yourself is to know who you really are — and not in comparison to anyone else. Three rules to live by:


Admire but don’t covet.

It’s great to look up to those in your industry who are kicking ass and taking names. But if, every time you read an article, you feel jealous or like giving up, then step away from the information. Strive to have similar successes but don’t fall prey to feeling less than.

Be secure in where you are.

We all have places we want to go, but if we aren’t secure in the process and in being where you are now, in this moment, do you really think you’ll feel any more secure when you’re at the top of your game? You don’t change — circumstances do. Deal with your feelings of discomfort or unworthiness and work them out. Because all the money in the world doesn’t change that game.

Stay authentic.

Just because everyone else is building brands and following a formula doesn’t mean that’s necessarily the right path for you. You must identify what feels authentic to your process. If you love breaking rules, break them. If you’re not a social media guru, focus on word of mouth. If sales aren’t your bag, find someone who lives for sales and hire them. There’s a difference between taking risks and feeling inauthentic. Always stay true to yourself.

Whatever your business goals, all you have to do is tune in to see what it is you really want and need. Who are you? Who are you in business? If the gal in sweatpants differs from the gal in her suit, figure out how to bridge the gap so you never feel like you’re acting. It’s all good and fine to live by the “fake it until you make it” motto, but why not just make it being exactly who you are?

Bring all of you to the table — the good, the bad, the successes, the uncertainty, the failures, and the messes. By doing that, you make yourself relatable.

-And when people can relate to you, they believe in you.

Just as you believe in yourself.

Lindsey Cavanaugh